メジャーデビューMejaa Debyuu指南Shinan

「おー、"oo,久しぶり！」hisashiburi!"

"Oh, long time no see!"

おーoo久しぶり。hisashiburi.俺oreな、na,今度kondoソニーsoniiからkaraメジャーデビューmejaa debyuuすんねん。sunnen.

Oh, long time! So listen, I'm about to make my major debut with Sony.

「え！？"e!?　メジャー？mejaa?　そりゃsorya大変taihenやなぁ、ya naa,終わったowattaな、na,御愁傷様」goshuushou sama"

"Huh?! Major? That's rough, man. It's over for you, my condolences"

なんでnandeや？ya?

Why's that?

「"当たり前atarimaeやんけyankeそんなsonnaもん。mon.『'メジャーmejaa行ってitteからkara変わった、kawatta,

"Obviously! You're gonna get the 'You changed since going major,

昔mukashiのnoほうhouがga良かった』yokatta'ってtte絶対zettai言われんで」iwarende"

you were better before' for sure"

そうか？sou ka?

You think?

「"言われるiwareruよ～。yo~.俺oreもmo言われたiwaretaもん」mon"

"Definitely. It happened to me too"

はぁ？haa?

Huh?

「"それにしてもsore ni shitemoおまえomaeメジャーmejaa行くんikunやったらyattara

"Anyway, if you're going major

もうちょっとmou chotto何とかnantokaせえよsee yoそのsono身なり」minari"

you gotta do something about that look"

なんやねんnan ya nenいきなり。ikinari.

What are you on about all of a sudden.

「"ミュージシャンmyuujishanはwa見た目mitameがga9割。kyuuwari.どんだけdondake上手いumai韻in踏んだり、fundari,

"Musicians are 90% looks. No matter how good your rhymes

蹴ったりkettariしてもshitemoそんなsonnaけったいなkettai naカッコkakkoしてたら…」shitetara..."

or kicks are, dressed like that weird..."

余計なyokei naお節介osekkaiや。ya.

Mind your own business.

「"髪kami切れ！kire!髭hige剃れ！sore!痩せろ！」yasero!"

"Cut your hair! Shave! Lose weight!"

放っとけ。hottoke.

Leave me alone.

「"アカンakanわwaそれsore先天性sentenseiや。ya.前前前世zenzenzenseiうらむuramuしかないshika naiわ、wa,整形seikeiせえ！」see!"

"Nah that's genetic. Blame your past three lives, get plastic surgery!"

なんでnandeお前omaeにni決定権ketteikenあんねん。annen.

Why do you get a say in this.

「"しっかしshikkashiお前omaeみたいなmitai na素人shiroutoにni毛ke生えたhaetaようなyou na奴、yatsu,ようyouデビューdebyuuできたdekitaな」na"

"Still, how'd an amateur like you even get a debut"

うっさいussaiな。na.

Shut up.

「CM"CM曲kyokuか？ka?　タイアップtaiaappuか？ka?　ゴリ押しgorioshiでdeエンディングテーマendingu teemaですdesuか？」ka?"

"A CM song? A tie-up? Forced into being an ending theme?"

そんなsonnaうまいことumai kotoいくikuかい。kai.

As if it'd go that smoothly.

「"印税inzeiか？ka?　外車gaishaか？ka?　港区minatokuか？」ka?"

"Royalties? Foreign car? Minato Ward?"

メジャーmejaaもmoそんなsonna景気keiki良うyouないねんnai nen今。ima.

The major scene ain't that lucrative anymore.

「"ところでtokoro deオマエ、omae,どのdono女優joyuuとto不倫furinすんねや？」sunne ya?"

"By the way, which actress are you gonna have an affair with?"

Throw Your Hands In the AirThrow Your Hands In the Air　俺たちゃoretacha妙なmyou na天秤tenbinのno上ue

Throw your hands in the air, we're on this weird scale

いつでもitsudemoフレッシュfuresshuかka古いfuruiかkaってtteふるいfuruiにniかけられkakerare震えてるfurueteruNight & dayNight & day

Always being sifted through as either fresh or outdated, shaking night & day

いっそissoThrow Your Hands In the AirThrow Your Hands In the Air　俺たちゃoretacha妙なmyou na天秤tenbinのno上ue

Just throw your hands in the air, we're on this weird scale

そもそもsomosomo比べるkuraberuべきbekiモンmonじゃねえja neeモンmonにni

Things that shouldn't even be compared get

ラベルraberu貼られてhararete売られてくuraretekuNight & dayNight & day

Labeled and sold off night & day

知ったshittaふりfuriしろshiro一見さんikkensan　RRとtoDJDJ松永matsunaga見参kenzan

Fake it 'til you make it, newcomers, R and DJ Matsunaga have arrived

いいii感じkanji　めちゃmechaいいii感じkanji　これkoreがga一般人ippanjinのnoHIPHOP SH*THIPHOP SH*T

Feeling good, so damn good, this is regular people's HIPHOP sh*t

ピークpiiku過ぎたらsugitara使い捨てtsukaisute　猥褻なwaisetsu na歌utaはwa歌い辛ぇutai zurre

Disposable once you peak, raunchy songs are hard to sing

でもdemoNutNut握りしめnigirishimeいざiza出陣shutsujin 　SS級kyuu素人shiroutoIn the buildingIn the building

But clutching our nuts, charging in, S-class amateurs in the building

「あぁ"aaそうそうsou souほんでhondeな」na"

"Oh yeah, and another thing"

まだmadaあんanのnoかい？kai?

There's more?

「"そもそもsomosomoR-指定R-shiteiってtte名前namaeがgaアカンakanよな」yo na"

"The name R-Shitei is a problem to begin with"

え？e?

What?

「"だってdatteバンドbandoでdeおるoruやん。yan.だいたいdaitaiクリスピードーナツkurisupii doonatsuって」tte"

"'Cause there's a band with that name. And Crispy Donuts?"

Creepy NutsCreepy Nutsやyaそろそろsorosoro覚えろ。oboero.

It's Creepy Nuts, learn it already.

「んで、"nde,お前omaeもっとmottoカラオケkaraokeでde歌いやすいutaiyasui歌uta作らなtsukuranaアカンakanわ、wa,

"And you gotta make songs people can sing at karaoke,

朝asaからkara流せるnagaseru爽やかな。sawayaka na.老若男女rounyakunanjoがga聴ける、kikeru,品行方正、hinkou housei,清廉潔白seiren keppaku

Something upbeat you can play in the morning. For all ages, squeaky clean

どこdokoにni出してもdashitemo恥ずかしくないhazukashikunai曲kyokuをwoやな」ya na"

Songs you wouldn't be embarrassed to play anywhere"

…。....

...

「あっ、"a,そういえばsou iebaお前omaeユーチューバーyuuchuubaaのno知り合いshiriaiおる？」oru?"

"Oh, you know any YouTubers?"

おらんoranわ。wa.

No.

「"インスタグラマーinsutaguramaaは？」wa?"

"Instagrammers?"

おらん！oran!

No!

「"作っとけtsukuttoke作っとけtsukuttokeお前、omae,宣伝sendenしてshiteもらえ、morae,今imaはwaそういうsou iu時代jidaiやyaぞ。zo.

"Get some! Get them to promote you, that's how it works now.

ほんでhonde今度kondo会ったらattaraサインsainもらっといて」morattoi te"

And next time get me an autograph"

誰dareの？no?

Whose?

「"誰dareでもdemo良い。ii.ほんでhondeな、na,キャラkyara設定setteiとto世界観sekaikanや。ya.コレkore一緒isshoにni考えたろkangaetaroか？」ka?"

"Anyone's. And hey, character branding and worldview. Want me to help with that?"

いらん、iran,んなnnaもん。mon.

Don't need it.

「"アホahoか！？ka!?　今imaはwaブランディング、burandingu,ブランディングburandinguやyaぞ」zo"

"Are you stupid?! It's all about branding, branding!"

「"まずmazuメンバーmenbaa増やせ、fuyase,ほんでhondeシンガーshingaa入れろ、iroro,

"First add more members, then get a singer,

それsore女onnaにniする？suru?どないdonaiする？suru?トライブtoraibuにniする？suru?

make it a girl? What do you think? Go tribe style?

他hokaにniもっとmottoちょこざいなchokozai na小細工kozaikuとかtokaいる？iru?

Need any other little tricks?

まあ、maa,そこらへんsokora henはwaソニーsoniiさんsanのnoお財布osaifuにni聞くkikuか」ka"

Well, we'll ask Sony's wallet about that"

お前omaeうるさいurusaiぞ！！zo!!　勝手にkatte niやらせろyaraseroや！ya!

Shut up already!! Let me do my thing!

「へぇ～。"hee~.ありがたきarigatakiアドバイスadobaisuをwoそないsonai捉えるんや。toraerunya.

"Wow. That's how you take well-meaning advice?

お前、omae,メジャーmejaa行ってitteからkara変わったkawattaよなぁ」yo naa"

You've really changed since going major, huh"

Throw Your Hands In the AirThrow Your Hands In the Air　俺たちゃoretacha妙なmyou na天秤tenbinのno上ue

Throw your hands in the air, we're on this weird scale

いつでもitsudemoフレッシュfuresshuかka古いfuruiかkaってtteふるいfuruiにniかけられkakerare震えてるfurueteruNight & dayNight & day

Always being sifted through as either fresh or outdated, shaking night & day

いっそissoThrow Your Hands In the AirThrow Your Hands In the Air　俺たちゃoretacha妙なmyou na天秤tenbinのno上ue

Just throw your hands in the air, we're on this weird scale

そもそもsomosomo比べるkuraberuべきbekiモンmonじゃねえja neeモンmonにni

Things that shouldn't even be compared get

ラベルraberu貼られてhararete売られてくuraretekuNight & dayNight & day

Labeled and sold off night & day

知ったshittaふりfuriしろshiro一見さんikkensan　RRとtoDJDJ松永matsunaga見参kenzan

Fake it 'til you make it, newcomers, R and DJ Matsunaga have arrived

いいii感じkanji　めちゃmechaいいii感じkanji　これkoreがga一般人ippanjinのnoHIPHOP SH*THIPHOP SH*T

Feeling good, so damn good, this is regular people's HIPHOP sh*t

ピークpiiku過ぎたらsugitara使い捨てtsukaisute　猥褻なwaisetsu na歌utaはwa歌い辛ぇutai zurre

Disposable once you peak, raunchy songs are hard to sing

でもdemoNutNut握りしめnigirishimeいざiza出陣shutsujin 　SS級kyuu素人shiroutoIn the buildingIn the building

But clutching our nuts, charging in, S-class amateurs in the building

企画kikakuto the to the 単体tantai to the to the 専属senzoku to the to the TOPTOP　そんなsonna青写真aojashin書き起こすkakiokosu

From project to solo to exclusive to the top, drafting that blueprint

スクールsukuuru／/プロダクションpurodakushon／/コンテストkontesuto／/オーディションoodishon

School / production / contest / audition

全てsubeteゴボウ抜きgobounuki穴馬anaumaのnoポジションpojishon

Blowing past everyone, the dark horse position

育成ikusei　養成yousei　ああせぇaaseeこうせぇkouseeうっせぇussee　来たるkitaru明日ashitaにni向けmuke引くhiku手ぐすねtegusune

Train them, mold them, do this do that shut up, flexing our muscles for tomorrow

MステM suteeもmo紅白kouhakuもmo射程圏内shateikennaiっちゃccha圏内、kennai,圏外kengaiっちゃccha圏外kengai　ド変態dohentai

M-Station and Kohaku are within range technically, out of range technically, total freaks

ラフrafuにni殴りこむnagurikomuパーティーピーポーpaatii piipoo　Hey！Hey!　これkoreはwa破れかぶれyabure kabureともtomo紙一重kamihitoe

Crashing the party rough, party people hey! This is a razor's edge from desperation

いきり立ったikiri tattaHIP HOPPERHIP HOPPER　We got yaWe got ya

Fired-up hip hoppers, we got ya

自称jishouハードコアhaadokoa食い散らかすkuichirakasu野良noraEverybodyEverybodyほらhora

Self-proclaimed hardcore devouring everything, stray dogs everywhere, look

Throw Your Hands In the AirThrow Your Hands In the Air　俺たちゃoretacha妙なmyou na天秤tenbinのno上ue

Throw your hands in the air, we're on this weird scale

いつでもitsudemoフレッシュfuresshuかka古いfuruiかkaってtte

Always being sifted through as either fresh or outdated

ふるいfuruiにniかけられkakerare震えてるfurueteruNight & dayNight & day

Shaking night & day

いっそissoThrow Your Hands In the AirThrow Your Hands In the Air　俺たちゃoretacha妙なmyou na天秤tenbinのno上ue

Just throw your hands in the air, we're on this weird scale

そもそもsomosomo比べるkuraberuべきbekiモンmonじゃねえja neeモンmonにni

Things that shouldn't even be compared get

ラベルraberu貼られてhararete売られてくuraretekuNight & dayNight & day

Labeled and sold off night & day

知ったshittaふりfuriしろshiro一見さんikkensan　RRとtoDJDJ松永matsunaga見参kenzan

Fake it 'til you make it, newcomers, R and DJ Matsunaga have arrived

いいii感じkanji　めちゃmechaいいii感じkanji　これkoreがga一般人ippanjinのnoHIPHOP SH*THIPHOP SH*T

Feeling good, so damn good, this is regular people's HIPHOP sh*t

ピークpiiku過ぎたらsugitara使い捨てtsukaisute　猥褻なwaisetsu na歌utaはwa歌い辛ぇutai zurre

Disposable once you peak, raunchy songs are hard to sing

でもdemoNutNut握りしめnigirishimeいざiza出陣shutsujin 　SS級kyuu素人shiroutoIn the buildingIn the building

But clutching our nuts, charging in, S-class amateurs in the building